Don't Take My Word For It

In case my words just aren't vivid enough, here's a link to a Web site with two pretty YouTube Balkan videos. One is a Bosnia montage, the other shows divers jumping off the main bridge in Mostar, an Mostarian summer tradition I look forward to witnessing.

Watch me

Vocabulous

Today we had a trip orientation thing at school, which included safety and language and pizza. The safety spiel was less painful that I thought it was going to be, and the language portion was as helpful as a 1-hour language lesson can be. Pizza was decent.

I learned the words for torture (muceneje) and orphan (djete iz doma), so I'm happy about that.

One of our classmates e-mailed us an extensive list of Croatian swear words and phrases. Man, those Balkanites have some dirty mouths. I'd love to share the most vulgar terms, but this is a family friendly blog.

There are still some good PG-13 sayings, including my personal favorite:

Skočit ću ti golom guzicom u lice -- I will jump in your face with my naked ass

Other winners:

1. Posro ti se bog u invalidska kolica -- God has shitted in your wheelchair (I wonder, can you only use this with crippled folk?)
2. Sprdim ti se u facu -- I fart in your face
3. Grickaj mi crno ispod no nih nokata -- Nibble on the black dirt under my toe nails


I'm digging the curses, but perhaps I should learn how to say "hello" before I master these.

Inappropriate Humor? Yes Please

Today I was waiting in line at an Indian lunch buffet, when one of my co-workers, a refugee from Croatia, began telling me about Bosnian men:

Croatian: The men in Mostar are tall and good looking and--mmm--so athletic. They're swimmers and water polo players. You'll see.
Me: That works for me. I'm down with a Bosnian love.
Croatian: Yes, the men are very good looking. That is, the ones that are left. Most of them are dead. Ha! A little dark humor for you there.


I think Bosnian humor and I are going to get along just fine.

Insert Croatian Greeting Here

If I knew how to say welcome or hello in Croatian, that would be the title of this post. But if I knew any word in Croatian I'd probably be so happy I'd be out celebrating rather than writing here.

In order to give people an additional way to procrastinate at work, I'm writing this blog. I don't know what the internet situation is going to be like in Mostar, Bosnia, but I plan on updating this blog to the best of my ability. And better I do that than send mass e-mails about my Bosnian adventures and mishaps (and there WILL be mishaps) to people or in-boxes that aren't interested.

I leave before the yogurts in my fridge expire. That scares me, because I'm really not ready.